Saturday, February 27, 2010

A Medal for Dylan From the White House

The National Medal of Arts awarded by the Nati...Image via Wikipedia

A Medal for Dylan From the White House
Compiled by Dave Itzkoff

The White House continues to pay tribute to Bob Dylan, right, in every way it knows how — whether or not Mr. Dylan is there to receive the honor. On Thursday, two weeks after he appeared in the East Room as part of a concert to commemorate Black History Month, Mr. Dylan was named one of 12 recipients of the National Medal of Arts, only this time he was not in attendance.

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Monday, February 22, 2010

Create your own music

An interesting music machine -- no musical knowledge required!

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Every dolphin's gone surfin'!

One of many terrific photos of dolphins surfing in South Africa, by Greg Huglin. Click the title to see more.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

National reactions to terrorist threats

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to a "Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666.

The Scots raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the Bastards" They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line in the British army for the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide". The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France 's white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country's military capability. It's not only the French who are on a heightened level of alert. Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout loudly and excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose".

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual , and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels .

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Americans meanwhile are carrying out pre-emptive strikes, on all of their allies, just in case.

New Zealand has also raised its security levels - from "baaa" to "BAAAA!". Due to continuing defence cutbacks (the air force being a squadron of spotty teenagers flying paper aeroplanes and the navy some toy boats in the Prime Minister's bath), New Zealand only has one more level of escalation, which is "Shit, I hope Australia will come end rescue us". In the event of invasion, New Zealanders will be asked to gather together in a strategic defensive position called "Bondi".

Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be all right, mate". Three more escalation levels remain, "Crikey!', "I think we'll need to cancel the Barbie this weekend" and "The Barbie is canceled". So far no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.

Glad I never faced this guy across the net -- Part Deux

A Ping-Pong-Playing Terminator
Your table-tennis dynasty is toast

From the latest issue of Popular Science

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Bob Dylan -- the official White House version

The printed lyrics leave a little to be desired, such as 'room' instead of 'roam'.

Friday, February 12, 2010

Wednesday, February 10, 2010